Zlatan Ibrahimovic's Free Kick From Last Night Is One of the Most Clutch Free Kicks of All Time.

ONIONSSSSSSS. For real though how is that poor goal keeper supposed to stop THAT. For a guy who is one of the most hated Athletes around the world he sure does have a way of wagging the middle finger at them all.... I sign off with the quote to end all quotes from the nosed one himself..... "They said they were going to send me into retirement.... I sent their whole country into retirement" (Mic Drop)

P.s. Dude filming just dropping vinegar strokes all over the place.

David "Big Papi" Ortiz set to retire at the end of 2016 Season

CBS Sports

Following reports that Red Sox DH/warrior-poet David Ortiz would retire after the 2016 season, Big Papi himself confirmed the news on Wednesday. On the occasion of his 40th birthday, Ortiz made the announcement via Derek Jeter's Players' Tribune ...

The 2016 season will be Ortiz's 20th at the big-league level. Across his 19 seasons to date -- 13 of which have been with Boston -- Ortiz has batted .284/.378/.547 (139 OPS+) with 503 homers; 584 doubles; and 2,303 hits. Those numbers don't include his career postseason line of .295/.409/.553 with 17 homers in 82 games. Along the way, he was named MVP of the 2004 ALCS and 2013 World Series.
Ortiz has been a core member of three championship Red Sox teams, and along the way he's put together a compelling Hall of Fame case. Since the Red Sox, despite their 2015 struggles, may be positioned to contend in 2016, Ortiz to add to his legend before stepping away for good. To that end, it's worth noting that Ortiz in 2015 -- his age-39 season -- batted a robust .273/.360/.553 with 37 homers. So even at an advanced baseball age, Big Papi is still capable of producing at a high level.
Even if the Hall doesn't await him, his place in Boston sports lore is unassailable.

Ohhhhhhhh would you look who is retiring.... Big Poopi. In all seriousness tough day for Red Sox fans. Ortiz single handedly won that franchise two World Series. Dude loved nothing more than dropping F bombs on live t.v. and hit ding dongs over that two foot fence in right at Fenway.

As a Yankee fan this is sweet in two separate ways.... The first is that one of the biggest Yankee killers of the past decade is now officially gone. The other is that none through a bigger hissy fit about the Jeter\Mariano goodbye tours than Papi himself.

The true injustice that will be done at the end of this whole thing is going to be that Big Papi wont end up in the Cooperstown. Numbers that automatically meant you were a first ballot Hall of Famer like 500+ homeruns now raise nothing but red flags to the voters for the Hall. Even I as one of the biggest Ortiz haters ever think that for his contributions to the Yankees lovable step brother (Red Sox nation) deserves to be in it.


But in the end...... Queue the MOTHER FUCKING MUSIC

NBA Legend and Pretty Good Head Coach Kevin McHale Fired By Rockets

CBS Sports

November 18, 2015 10:15 AM ET

After appearing in the conference finals last season, the Houston Rockets were expected to be one of the top teams this season. After a 4-7 start, the Rockets decided enough is enough and fired coach Kevin McHale, CBS Sports' Ken Berger confirms. Per Yahoo's Adrian Wojnarowski, assistant coach J.B. Bickerstaff will take over as interim coach.

The Rockets signed McHale to a three-year, $13 million extension less than a year ago.
McHale had been the Rockets' coach since the start of the 2011-12 season and actually has the highest win percentage in Hoston's coaching history with a regular-season record of 193-130. In five postseason appearances, McHale's playoff record with Houston was 13-16. However, the Rockets are losers of four straight and just lost to the Boston Celtics on Monday night by 16 points. This has been a theme, as they started with three straight 20-point losses before winning their first game.

Today is the day that the Houston Rockets have finally and completely shit their collective pants. I'm over 1,700 miles from Houston and even I can smell the shit. I mean sure you're off to a 4-7 start and sure you have the seventh highest combined players salaries in the league but Kevin McHale is a God damn LEGEND. I mean behind my version of the Shaq hook+spin move which I so eloquently coined as the Caucasian Tornado the Kevin McHale up and under was my favorite.

After the fact that he is a legend let's take a look at what the super stars of this team have done this season. Dwight Howard is currently averaging less rebounds per game than Russel Westbrook and is playing limited minutes so he can rest. Dwight Howard has got to be the weirdest guy in the whole NBA (and that's really saying something I.E. Lance Stephenson). Then we come to James Harden or as the Natives call him He Who Guards no one.... I mean seriously I prolly weigh in right around 350 lbs (and I'm dead sexy I might add) but I can promise you I can play better defense than that guy.

With all that being said the Rockets have to make it out of the West in order to win a Championship and I don't think the Warriors are even going to lose this year.

 

That weird thing from Zooboomafoo died and I couldn't be happier

USA Today

Imagine a time before YouTube made millionaire grumpy cats and celebrity sloth sanctuaries, when cuteness overload Vines were merely a dream recorded in a Lisa Frank dolphin-emblazoned trapper keeper.

 

There was Zoboomafoo, and he was an instant classic.

Jovian, the Coquerel's sifaka lemur and star of the short-lived PBS wildlife show for kids, Zoboomafoo, died Monday of kidney failure at the Duke Lemur Center in Durham, N.C. He was 20½ years old.

Curious Jovian bounced, snacked and stared blankly at kids during the 65-episode run of Zoboomafoo, which produced new episodes for preschoolers on PBS from 1999 to 2001 under the helm of brothers Martin and Chris Kratt.

"He'd jump in through the window and we'd feed him mangoes or garbanzo beans. Sometimes he'd grab our noses with those soft sifaka hands," co-host Martin Kratt reminisced on Facebook.

For lucky animal-loving channel-flippers, the show is still occasionally available via syndication. For us '90s kids in mourning (or remembering how annoyed we were when it aired instead of a rerun of Arthur), well, that's what the Internet is for:

Well one of my least favorite children's show characters is dead. Seriously I don't even know or care what that big tree climbing rat of an animal was but it haunted me throughout my early and very impressionable years. The actual animal itself is pretty creepy looking but the damn puppet they used to portray this so called "lemur" was horrifying. 

That puppet's piercing little eye till this day creep me the fuck out. 

The thing that I don't get is how the whole world is now in mourning over this.... Am I taking crazy pills? I mean you all had to have seen the incredible creepiness of this little fucker I mean c'mon. 

P.S. The Kraft brothers definitely molest Collies and most likely are stinky fingering this puppet in the picture. 

 

 

 

P.P.S. USA Today be more of a nerd..... No one ever got pissed that Arthur wasn't going to be on. The kids that watched that show are still virgins today.... Now if Legends of The Hidden Temple wasn't going to be on well then let the riots begin.....

Facebook is Shit and its Shitiness is What Keeps You Coming Back

If you asked 15 year old BUSH if he liked Facebook he would reply: You mean Myspace right? In this one case 15 year old BUSH was correct to think Myspace was cool. However with Myspace came the dawn of the social media feud. It wasn't the type of feud that involved a countless comment chain of people trying to out rage each other instead  it was a text from your homeboy who was pissed because you moved him down your top 15 friends because decisions had to be made and the girl you liked had to move towards the top of your list. I almost forgot my favorite part about Myspace........ The hot fire flames playlist you could put together on your page and how your song meant something unique about you..... I still remember to this day logging on to my Myspace page just to listen to Its Me Snitches (which surprisingly has lost its luster today) Then around 17-18 you finally became cool enough (or in my case new fangled technology finally made it to the middle of nowhere) to get a Facebook. This new magical experiment of social media finally made it to my lap. I instantly started to love the fact that I could post whatever was on my mind and people could see it. It was intoxicating at first.........

Then came college and you joined the elite group of nerds who would be attending the same school as you in the fall and all the ridiculous questions they would post on the newly created Class of yada yada ya at the university of who cares. Looking at those kids post then became the intoxicating thing. It became who was going to post the most ridiculous or absurd thing first. Then halfway through 2012 you got your first friend request from your Aunt Thelma who lives too look at all the crazy shit you are doing at college. She suddenly has the access to your deepest darkest secrets..... The kegstand you did in the basement of some fraternity on campus or the fact you are in a relationship with some girl and now feels the immediate need to tell your mother who you have not told yet..... And then (much to my chagrin) the shit started to flow down hill suddenly every aunt you have, and even some you didn't know you had got on the book of faces and you had to accept them or they would tell your mom. "Why wont you accept Aunt So and So's friend request" became a main staple of my staple of mine and my mother's conversations.

This brings us to today's Facebook that has somehow become filled with social scientists and activists. If I see one more new friend that changes their profile picture to a France flag I may freak the hell out...... But I digress. The new groups of either the incredibly ignorant or the new found political theorists give me a good chuckle or two...... Wait but that means Facebook is fun.... And is something you always have to watch. Facebook is now like a train wreck waiting to happen every day. Like a great clip of reality T.V. you have to watch even if you know its ridiculous. At the end of the day that beautiful genius Zuckerberg has us all eating out of his hand like hungry little piggies. Seriously the guy has created a 24-7 reality t.v. network and I for one hate that I cant get enough.